My daughter leaves for college on Monday. Oh, she is not all packed up with a car full of her most valued possessions.  She merely needs to grab her backpack of book, pen, and paper to be on her way. Her Daddy will most likely drop her off as I am in tears now even writing about the thought of it. Gratefully, she will walk out of class to be retrieved by him three hours later and will sleep under our roof and in her own bed.

Alas, she is still in high school and embarking on a dual enrollment class starting college while she wraps up her high school. Nothing could makes this Momma’s heart happier.  I so much want to, and am ready, to see her fly, but I am ever so grateful it is at a pace I can slowly wrap my heart around. This past year has been filled with watching from the sidelines as I have witnessed a handful of dear friends send their beloved children away to college. Tough stuff. I admire their courage, both student and parent.

We all have our journeys. For the moment, God’s plan for both my daughter and me to transition into this next season of life is one of unfolding…step by step. This really has been His plan for us together all along. Taking a step, wrapping my heart and mind around it, then moving forward confidently.  The day my eldest went to preschool comes flooding back to me. She was then my only child. I came home to the quiet and just sobbed.  She was embarking on the world and on her own…albeit for two hours at a time in a safe environment.  The sweet part was that it was on our own terms, not something we were required to do. We just knew she was ready for it and that she would thrive.  We had plans to home educate but knew the value of creating a setting where she would be learning respect for another adult who would teach her, functioning within a group, saying thank you and I am sorry to her peers, and sharing. This experience on Sunday mornings in church made our girl happy but we were her Sunday school teachers. It was time to venture further.

Another milestone in the life of raising our daughter was dropping her off at Sewing Class.  After a summer of doing a mother/daughter beginning quilting class at church, I told my husband that if I continue to try to teach her to sew she will absolutely hate it. My fear of that machine sewing right through a finger overwhelmed me and I had proceeded to mother-hen her nearly to death. So I sought out a woman who LOVED to sew and was passionate about teaching young girls her skill.  It was a fabulous endeavor of learning to create that lasted half a dozen years and in the process, built a sweet friendship that developed between student and teacher.

Our education journey has continued to be just that…teaching our children the basics, sharing our own passions with them, and finding others we could employ who were delighted to teach the things they enjoyed most.  Am I pro-homeschooling? Absolutely not. I am pro-whatever-works-best for your kid. I am delighted to see my friends’ children who bloomed in public, or private, or homeschool settings or a combination over the years.

The key element in all was that their parents kept that watchful eye over them. They tended them carefully, replanted if needed, watched out for the weeds that impeded their growth. They carefully chose their “yes” and “no” responses. They picked their battles and fought hard for the ones they had to win for the character of their child.  And then, when the time was right, they began the process of letting go. For me, that timing came late last winter when I realized we would soon have a senior in high school.

Nothing about that seemed right. Everything in me knew the timing was off. We needed more moments. There were things left to do and not enough hours ahead to do them.  I asked our daughter to consider a fifth year of high school and she immediately responded “no”. So I sat back and watched and I devoted my concern to prayer.  Then, I began to question her of her reasons. Turns out that she was bored, that she needed a change. Well, that was easy.  Aside from completing a couple of science and math credits, we could chuck the current plan and start anew. We could carve out more time for family and for friendship and educational endeavors.

Life as we knew it shifted. She decided to choose a fifth year of high school with a plan to start some college early. Opportunities that were new and fresh suddenly came into her path.  She has spent more time being intentional to do things with friends and with her family and on her own creatively. My Momma’s heart is at peace as I see her transition from teenager to young adult in a fashion that suits her.  My girl has gone and grown up on me, just as she should have done…and life is good.