Yes, I am a Facebook fan. I absolutely love seeing moments in the lives of my growing great-nephews and nieces. I enjoy seeing the things those I care about are interested in. I like being reminded of birthdays and seeing throwback Thursday pictures. I am finding joy in reconnecting to pieces of my past with those who have, at points, shared my journey.
Around here, though, I call it Facade-book. It helps me keep perspective. A quick Google search of synonyms of “facade” netted the following:
show, front, appearance, pretense, simulation, affectation, act,
semblance, illusion, masquerade, charade, mask, cloak, veil, veneer
Now, it is not that I find the things people post are phony…I don’t. I just need to continually remind myself to keep perspective and understand that it is easy to become disillusioned that my “friends” have a better marriage, happier kids, a nicer home, better family relationships, take a better “selfie” pic than I will ever manage to do, and on and on. I know all this isn’t true. Reality is that we are all in the thick of a life that is filled with happy moments and not so good ones. For most of us, it is the happier times which are those that land on Facebook.
That is not a bad thing.
But, we now live in a world where more and more we remind ourselves of what we didn’t do, we didn’t get….and are daily faced with those who seemingly got it better. We look at what is lacking in our lives, in who we are, more than all the great things we accomplish, the joys that surround us, the many blessings that fill our lives. It is so easy to be so critical of ourselves as we look at those around us and get fooled into believing they are experiencing a better existence.
Where do we find our happy? I was reminded yesterday of one of my favorite things to say when I am speaking before a group of women – look at that woman seating to your left, look at that woman seated to your right. You are not her. So stop looking. You were uniquely created to be someone special, to be YOU.
It is time for us to stop chasing after a facade of the perfect version of us. You know, the one who actually DOES all those Pinterest crafts she posts, who feeds her family only the best possible things, who has the fabulous relationships we see in the movies, has a well kept home and manicured lawn and…you know what I am talking about.
So I encourage you to take time today to ponder “what does the best version of me look like?”…not for the sake of chasing perfection or keeping up with your girlfriends but for the pursuit of a life enjoyed, a life well-lived, a life where you figure out your purpose and your passion and go after it.
Give yourself permission to enjoy posting fabulous things on Pinterest that you know full well you may never, ever get around to doing but you had fun thinking about them when you posted them and sharing ideas with others OR take time today to do one of those things only because it makes you happy or may be given to someone else to bring them joy. Pick one relationship that you want to give more attention to and start doing so now. Begin parting with the things that pull you down and keep you from moving forward.
And when you read my or anyone else’s blog, look at their Pinterest account, peruse their Facebook, visit their home, sit at a table full of ladies in a book study or mom’s group or any other arena that surrounds you with women with seemingly perfected lives, remember…JUST LIKE YOU – we are struggling, hoping, persevering, disappointed at times, growing, changing women.
May our pursuit not be a perfected life
but of a life spent in search of peace, joy, and contentment…
